Saturday, August 1, 2009

You Have Nice Hair For a Dark Skin Girl!!!


..... I know the title is a bit much... but I have heard this from alot of people pertaining to my co-worker. I can't believe some people but here is my story. She has beautiful , waist length,fine spirals that compliment her chocolate skin. My coworker is very use to this but it disturbing that just because someones complexion can determine their hairtype. So many people stare at her and make comments such as "that must be a weave".." wow look at her".....I wonder ..
I wonder WOULD PEOPLE WHISPER OR MAKE SIDE COMMENTS OF DISBELIEF IF SHE WAS A FEW SHADES LIGHTER?

20 comments:

CurvyGurl ♥ said...

Talk about ignorant. I'll never understand why people make those kinds of comments, I think it's a sign of their own insecurity.

S-hair said...

She's gorgeous! I'm Jamaican and so I see every combination of black people...the island is one big mix up and it is great. If you even take a good look at your friend it it shouldn't even be a surprise that she has that type of hair I think...she obviously looks mixed, to me anyhow.

Maybe seeing her will change people's mentality of what dark/light skinned means....nothing

Nikki said...

You know.. that stems from straight ignorance. It's hard to believe - yet in still NOT hard to believe, that people are still strapped in the color/hair shackles. Even if the young lady was wearing a weave why does it matter? Her hair looks nice... ok, move along. People absolutely kill me with remarks like this... "are your eyes real, hair real.. etc etc...???" You would think that after all this time.. and the vanessa williams', halle berry, whoopi goldberg's, alicia keys'.. etc etc Black and people that are of African Decent come in all shade, tone, textures, and colors... One drop of black can change a latino's, caucasian, asian looks entirely... as we see with mixed children period. I guess the bottom line irritant to me is: Why does it matter??? It is one thing to be genuinely interested to know someones ethnicity, or to compliment their hair. But to say OH it's a weave 'cuz it's nice? That's just ignorant... and on another note.. Put them in theri place...I say it all the time---> There is NO such thing as good or bad hair...it is "easy" to manage and "hard to manage hair. Great post girl!

Enchantress said...

Very ignorant...hopefully people will start to wise up!

Romney said...

So ignorant!!! My goodness. I cannot stand when this happens. I find it completely ignorant to say such things. And to be honest I am sure people would NOT say that if she was a few shades lighter. It's sad that she is used to things like that. She really should ask people what does that mean? When they tell her she has nice hair for a dark skin girl? I am still confused myself. Maybe she should ask and let you know what they say.

TheSistahChick said...

I find it very sad to know that we are STILL color struck amongst ourselves in this day and age. it just goes to show you how deep the wounds of slavery go. Thanks for speakin on it.

:-)

Jessi B. said...

People have said this to me, actually. Until they see my mother, who's lighter than me with long, thick, wavy-when-wet hair, they figure I MUST have a texturizer or some other tool I'm using to create a curl pattern. When they see my mom, the tone changes to, "OOOOH, I see now. My hair won't do that."

:|

But beyond that blatant ignorance, in my opinion, we still have a ways to go in the natural community to accept anything "less" than a curl. All the custards, creams, gels, etc still contribute to a problem amongst naturals (and those contemplating going natural) who struggle to accept the way their hair grows. But I guess, hey, it's a journey for us all.

Long story short, ditto to the other ladies comments! Another great post :)

JanJanGossip said...

Hey Ya'll,

I get this comment all the time and my hair is not even as long as your co-workers. It is sad that when you are African Decent people think you cannot have nice hair, or be intelligent amongst other things. It's terrible that we still have the slave mentality but none the less we must not perpetuate the stereotype and educate people. I often go to starbucks and the worker there asked what I used in my hair, I told her and even printed out the few products I do use. She asked if I were all black...I said HELL YES I am. I hate when people try and be something else.....BLACK girls have hair also....it's no such thing as good hair just healthy hair...we need that mentality but until then the idiots exist :(......peace YANTAN

Lena Jolie said...

They definitely wouldnt be trippin if she was a few shades lighter. Unfortunately some people are still wrapped up in that dark-skinned/light-skinned/nappy-haired/good-haired madness. So I guess she's supposed to have "naps" and kinks and what not just because she's darker...ignorant people need to be slapped for real. That's just like trippin on a light chick because her hair is kinky and what not. They need to wake up: your skin color does not determine whether you are supposed to have finer hair or courser hair...its about pre-determined genetics, what your dna says your hair will be like, based on biological factors....

Smh....Its so dumb....I hate it lol

Today I go by Lyn said...

Thats like when people say 'you have nice features for a black girl'. Are stereotypical black features bad? a narrow nose vs a broader one? fuller lips vs thinner?... its all nonsense to me. I think the media plays a huge role in peoples opinions of people of certain ethnicities because they usually portray people with certain features. However, they make up how much of the actual amount of people on the world??

My father, for example is considered to be have a dark complexion but he was born and grew up with blonde hair and hazel eyes. It wasn't until he got older that his hair color changed to be much darker. Everyone is different and beautifully unique in their own way, long short, straight, or curly hair, or whatever they may have!

And yea, I think they wouldn't make such comments if she was lighter. I have met a few African women, like actually from Africa, not African Americans, that have long straight or long wavy hair that is 100% theres! down to their bums and everything.

Shoshoni said...

Hey Ladies,
My best friend is a dark shade of chocolate. She has two black parents and is not from an island or anything. She also has beautiful long, thick natural hair that people assume is a weave. Its almost like a lot of black folks think that black girls can't grow long hair unless they're "mixed with something.". Guys have also said to her," I don't usually date dark skinned girls, but you're cute!"...She usually tells then, "Well, don't do me any favors!!!"

TheSistahChick said...

I might be late with this or repeating, so i apologize if so, but have you guys heard about Chris Rocks new movie-"Good Hair"? Has anybody seen this? It was at Sundance but comes to theaters Oct 9th. I can't wait to check it out! thanks again for speakin on it YANTAN!

Shandra E...*the misses said...

That's obnoxious!!! My whole family has really "random" genes: light skinned with really short, coarse hair, dark skinned with waist length wavy jet black hair, Men who's hair grow long, faster than some of the women in the fam, etc??!! && when someone see my dark skinned family members with long hair, they ask "who did your hair...as if it's a weave!!" not to know the stylist (cuz it's usually just 'there' & not done!!) YET when they see a lighter fam with longer hair they'll ask "what are you mixed with"?! lol....&& when my pur chocolate/dark skin cousin (who has a brown skin mom & carmel dad) wears her hair down (to her butt) people TELL her she's mixed & she just doesn't know her history?!! (what kind of nerve?!) lol...technically The whole human race is mixed, but both OUR family is Black!! so it's crazy what people will say to make sense of their ignorance?!!
smh....you'd think we'd know by now....even dark skin babies usually come out yellow & stay that way past one yrs. old?!! like really, we should all just get over it...We're "colored" people for a reason...so many shades & variations of genes!!

Sassy Steph B said...

I get that mess all the time. I dont ignore it however because if u dont force people to question where they get their ideas from then they'll never realize how ignorant it is.

the fight to fabulous said...

hey, thanks for stopping by! This is a loaded statement because it suggests that black hair that looks like black hair isn't 'nice'-this is a serious issue I have within the natural hair community (that has been addressed on various blogs) where we buy all the products possible to make our hair look curlier than it is, cause kinky just isn't cute enough. It begs the question, how much of our natural state are we really embracing? I really digressed there, but yes, that comment 'you have nice hair for a dark skin girl' speaks volumes!

Toy said...

SMH..... I'm as light as they come and NOBODY believes that I'm not mixed. I have to show family photos before most people believe me. Most mixed people are darker then me and both my parents, grandparents, greatgrand parents are black. You can be any shade, and any hair type and still get all kinds of judgement cast upon you. I'm just blessed that I have hair!

Aiyo said...

That is stupid first of all fully black woman can have long beautiful healthy hair wheter relaxed natural or whatever second of all darker skinned people can still be mixed

Tatianna Ali - Afro Panimanian Indo Trindadian

Kenya Moore - African American & Native American


Chilli from TLC is is mixed with Indo Trinidadian too I think

Seriously just because you are light doesn't mean you are mixed and just because you are dark doesn't mean you aren't its just you are mixed with something other than black that has dark skin

I am nigerian and dark skinned and people assume I am half asian most south asian and south east asian because I have long hair WTF?

Babydoll said...

Some people just don't know what to say!! You should hear some of the things people say to me about my hair!! CRAZY!!

Anonymous said...

she's so beautiful :)

Anonymous said...

Americans have a totally different take,on hair and skin tone than Carribeans . In the Carribean Chinese and Indians mix with blacks, especially in Guyana, and Trinidad. So there are tons of chocolate blacks with straight, wavy, curly and super curly long hair. I am one of them. I came to this.forum because.when I wear my hair straight people dont believe its really curly. Biracial half black and white girls annoy me because some reinforce the whole light skin good.hair stereotype. And many of them seem to feel that someone cannot be dark with straight hair.
I am a mostly black with an Asian Caribe Indian mix along with a dash of portugese and british. So when I was little I had reddish brown hair with blonde edges! And yes I am a chocolate skinned blackgirl. When I flat iron my hair people think its a wig. Then my eyes are slanted and face is wide,.cheek bones.high. Ive gotten Nigerian and everyone thinks I have a perm. Or curled my hair with tiny rollers! Lol.
But its all real no chemicals.

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